Apparently, my ability to kill RSA SecurID tokens is as strong as ever.
This morning, as I was limping through the parking lot in the uncharacteristically brisk morning air, favoring the tender ankle pain from last night's roller derby practice, I performed my usual routine of pulling out my cell phone to silence it so as not to irritate the smack out of my neighboring colleagues.
Anyhow, as I tinkered with the phone and strolled through the lot, I found myself suddenly airborn and without control of my feet. As in a slow-motion replay, I realized I'd somehow caught the end of a parking lot cement bumper and it was what prevented my feet from catching up to my careening body.
I grimaced at the familiar sound of plastic clinking onto the pavement, and groaned as my blackberry separated into pieces, much like the Treo did the day I got mini-mugged by mini-thugs on the corner of Marcy Ave in Brooklyn. I spited myself for ordering the blackberry case yesterday, as it was both too late and the likely catalyst of Murphy's Law.
As I got back to my feet, and picked up the pieces of my phone, I reached next for my car keys. As the keys rolled in my hand and the token came into view, I saw a giant black scrudge (scratch+smudge) across the plastic. And then I saw a series of characters that more resembled the ancient script of the Star Wars Aurek-Besh alphabet than actual romanized digits. In fact, only the last number of the six-digit code displays completely.
That, moreso than the scruffs on my blackberry, pissed me off. I thought these new tokens would be Steph-proof. They've clearly reengineered them several times, and yet...mine is dead. And from what? A little crash to the pavement?
Well, at least it didn't die from static charge, I guess. But how the hell do I explain this to the Help Desk? "Hi, this is Stephanie, and I've once again killed my token."
03 January 2008
27 December 2007
Three quotes
Three recently memorable utterances:
"Diamonds are overrated. Wiis are forever." -- my boss
"C as in Charlie, A as in apple, F as in Frank, H as in...something that begins with H..." -- Mike T., cube neighbor
"That puppy is soooo cute! Except it's pooping on the rink." -- random skater, observing Bettie Krueger's Jack Russel puppy laying turd on our rink
15 December 2007
it's on, bitches.
08 December 2007
my choice is...Zooma Thurman!!!
The survey results are in! Check out my alter ego: Zooma Thurman!
You may notice that the name I chose is NOT the winner of the most points in my "weighted vote" scale below (2 for perfect, 1 for good). I decided to take some responsibility for the fact that lots of little girls attend these bouts, and therefore opted not to take a name that conveyed or implied alcohol -- no matter how much I love my tequila.
It was, however, a close race, and I'm tickled with the fact that my top choices got the most votes too!
Write ins:
You may notice that the name I chose is NOT the winner of the most points in my "weighted vote" scale below (2 for perfect, 1 for good). I decided to take some responsibility for the fact that lots of little girls attend these bouts, and therefore opted not to take a name that conveyed or implied alcohol -- no matter how much I love my tequila.
It was, however, a close race, and I'm tickled with the fact that my top choices got the most votes too!
| "Perfect" | "Good" | Points |
| Maggie Rita (#4-2-1) | 16 | 1 | 17 |
| Zooma Thurman | 8 | 5 | 13 |
| Mad Donna | 8 | 4 | 12 |
| Imelda Blockos (#1060) | 8 | 3 | 11 |
| Audrey Floorburn | 4 | 7 | 11 |
| Marilyn Monroll | 8 | 3 | 11 |
| Brooklyn Bridgette | 6 | 3 | 9 |
| Pain Fonda | 6 | 3 | 9 |
| Kissy Goodsmacks | 2 | 6 | 8 |
| Cinderolla | 4 | 4 | 8 |
| Sadie Blockins | 4 | 5 | 7 |
| Betty Booty | 6 | 1 | 7 |
| Lady Diatribe | 4 | 3 | 7 |
| Steffi Graffiti | 4 | 2 | 6 |
| Vanessa Agressa | 2 | 4 | 6 |
| Starblocks | 2 | 3 | 5 |
| Emilia Big Deal Ya | 0 | 5 | 5 |
| Emilia Playhard | 2 | 3 | 5 |
| Monica Lewinskate | 2 | 2 | 4 |
| Virginia Suicide | 0 | 3 | 3 |
| Mrs. Johnny Depp | 4 | 3 | 7 |
| Jackie Smacks | 2 | 1 | 3 |
| Janie Smash | 2 | 0 | 2 |
| Mary Skate | 0 | 0 | 0 |
Write ins:
- Lilith Notso Fair, Ho' Lottapane, Ginny Hoffa, Nasty Nancy, Maggie McKill, Ma Guerita, Ripya Newwon, Roxanne Rolls, Tee Wrecks (my father)
- Writer's Block-er, UMass Mauler, My Brady's Daddy, Obi Blonde Kenobi, Darth Skater, Blockimus Prime (Jon, obviously - lol)
- Duchess of Debauchery, Alotta Pain, Sadie Slayed/Slain/Slayer/Killer, Sugar Smacks (Autumn)
- Slamin Sweaty Steffi (someone on comcast...)
07 December 2007
a special, secure day for me.
Ah, a blast from my past...
Today, as a new employee at my new job, I got an RSA SecurID token in the mail, and it felt like a wonderful trinket of nostalgia. Before I could even get back to my desk, I ripped the package open to examine my new and improved key fob.
I pulled out the documentation, examining it carefully for any signs of familiarity. But my company customized the Getting Started -- there were no instructions for checking my package -- so I knew it didn't come from my doc friends at RSA, a division of EMC.
I went to the URL provided in the doc, which was a location on our intranet. Immediately the RSA SecurID tour kicked off, and I envisioned Debbie smiling like Vanna White when that new tour was unveiled in Flash several years ago. I decided to skip the tour, because I knew more already than any person should about two-factor authentication. For me, it's three-factor: something I have, something I know, and something I know all too well.
I went back to the intranet to find the registration site, knowing I'd need to enter that elusive serial number and choose my PIN. I caressed the light grey fob between my fingers as Web Express loaded on the page before me. WEB EXPRESS!! And all its signs of Gideon with those little red angle bracket buttons that resemble the company's logo. I still have some of those business cards...
Ah, Web Express. It brings me back to the days of long meetings in dark rooms with giant bags of Skittles...and Shane. I'll never forget it...
Barb and I were munching on a giant bag of Skittles to stay awake in the marathon Web Express teleconference. When the Skittles were gone, Shane passed a dollar across the table at me. "Thanks," I told him as I passed the bill back, "but you don't owe me anything!"
"No," he said, returning the bill to me. "Go get me more."
I said lots of colorful things about him after that day.
But back to the point! The point of exciting burst of nostaliga! So many fond memories brought back by my brush with destiny! Look how the word "passcode" is no longer in all caps! And how ACE/Server has non-breaking spaces around the slash! I remember how those third party licenses used to cause such stress...or maybe that was the Marketing department. Who cares!
In the end, I intend to be planful and flog my fob to my best of my ability. I'll put it on my keychain and hope that they re-engineered the static flaw, and that I don't have to "reenter" my PIN (please, no hyphens) when using the Query Tool.
I miss you, RSA. And by "you," I mean the cafeteria grill cook who made my grilled cheese without butter. And Shane.
Today, as a new employee at my new job, I got an RSA SecurID token in the mail, and it felt like a wonderful trinket of nostalgia. Before I could even get back to my desk, I ripped the package open to examine my new and improved key fob.
I pulled out the documentation, examining it carefully for any signs of familiarity. But my company customized the Getting Started -- there were no instructions for checking my package -- so I knew it didn't come from my doc friends at RSA, a division of EMC.
I went to the URL provided in the doc, which was a location on our intranet. Immediately the RSA SecurID tour kicked off, and I envisioned Debbie smiling like Vanna White when that new tour was unveiled in Flash several years ago. I decided to skip the tour, because I knew more already than any person should about two-factor authentication. For me, it's three-factor: something I have, something I know, and something I know all too well.
I went back to the intranet to find the registration site, knowing I'd need to enter that elusive serial number and choose my PIN. I caressed the light grey fob between my fingers as Web Express loaded on the page before me. WEB EXPRESS!! And all its signs of Gideon with those little red angle bracket buttons that resemble the company's logo. I still have some of those business cards...
Ah, Web Express. It brings me back to the days of long meetings in dark rooms with giant bags of Skittles...and Shane. I'll never forget it...
Barb and I were munching on a giant bag of Skittles to stay awake in the marathon Web Express teleconference. When the Skittles were gone, Shane passed a dollar across the table at me. "Thanks," I told him as I passed the bill back, "but you don't owe me anything!"
"No," he said, returning the bill to me. "Go get me more."
I said lots of colorful things about him after that day.
But back to the point! The point of exciting burst of nostaliga! So many fond memories brought back by my brush with destiny! Look how the word "passcode" is no longer in all caps! And how ACE/Server has non-breaking spaces around the slash! I remember how those third party licenses used to cause such stress...or maybe that was the Marketing department. Who cares!
In the end, I intend to be planful and flog my fob to my best of my ability. I'll put it on my keychain and hope that they re-engineered the static flaw, and that I don't have to "reenter" my PIN (please, no hyphens) when using the Query Tool.
I miss you, RSA. And by "you," I mean the cafeteria grill cook who made my grilled cheese without butter. And Shane.
06 December 2007
i need advice.
Just in case you didn't get my email, please help me pick my new roller derby alter ego by taking this survey:
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=tjfg2w9ZgNCGQ1ddzXq4cQ_3d_3d
I have too many ideas -- and I could go on FOREVER -- but time is now of the essence.
(I got online to pay my electric bill. Three hours later, I've got a survey and a new blog post.)
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=tjfg2w9ZgNCGQ1ddzXq4cQ_3d_3d
I have too many ideas -- and I could go on FOREVER -- but time is now of the essence.
(I got online to pay my electric bill. Three hours later, I've got a survey and a new blog post.)
29 November 2007
update from duluth
tonight is my last night in duluth, minnesota. and i'm a little glad, really. it was -18 degrees this morning with the wind chill.
aside from that, however, it was a pretty good week at the new job. it got off to a rocky start when i flew in on monday and flew out...also on monday. i was in town for about 6 hours in between. but i got back in town tuesday night, and spent all of wednesday and thursday (today) training with my new colleague cory. we wrap it up tomorrow before i fly out again.
i gotta say, i can't WAIT to get back to florida. warm, sunny, wonderful florida.
aside from that, however, it was a pretty good week at the new job. it got off to a rocky start when i flew in on monday and flew out...also on monday. i was in town for about 6 hours in between. but i got back in town tuesday night, and spent all of wednesday and thursday (today) training with my new colleague cory. we wrap it up tomorrow before i fly out again.
i gotta say, i can't WAIT to get back to florida. warm, sunny, wonderful florida.
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